Pacer

The following site has TONS of amazing resources for educators, kids, teens, and parents. Be sure to check it out. I promise it will be worth your time!

 http://www.pacer.org/bullying/nbpm/

When I contacted the site and asked for permission to use their site in my blog they also told me to share information on the WE WILL generation project Pacer has been working on.
http://www.pacer.org/bullying/wewillgen/
This part of their site specifically targets students trying to stop bullying. I spent time looking at this page and found it to be very inspiring. So many teens are trying to fight against bullying now, just like me!

Digital Petition

One out of every three students will be bullied this year. This might be happening to someone you know and care about. Unite with others, show that you care, and add your voice to the online petition.

Sign it here:
http://www.pacer.org/bullying/digitalpetition/

Trust me, it is something that doesn't take long and is worth it to be able to say that you are fighting against bullying now! I signed it and it took me about 1 minute (I was signature 60,506...isn't that amazing that so many people are in this movement?!). Sign the Digital Petition!!

Bullying Statistics

The following website has great information on bullying and bullying awareness:

 http://www.bullyingstatistics.org/

Be sure to check it out for more information!
Here is some of what the site has to offer:

Bullying Vs. Violence

Though bullying is often considered a form of physical or psychological violence, bullying has some different root causes than other types of violence, and also may require different prevention strategies. Let's compare bullying vs violence for a better understanding. 

Violence may be defined as doing harm to another, whether physical or mental. Under this definition, bullying would be considered a form of violence. Comparatively, bullying is different from other types of violence, however, because it usually occurs when one person or group of people singles out another person with the intent of being mean through:

• Name-calling
• Teasing
• Pushing
• Hitting
• Threatening
• Spreading rumors
• Playing mean practical jokes
• Social exclusion

Bullying behavior is usually repeated over a period of time until it becomes a pattern. Victims often feel helpless and unable to fight back or defend themselves.

Bullying may take place in person or through electronic media devices, and may be direct or indirect, in comparison violence is always physical. While boys are more likely to engage in violence and in physical bullying, girls are more likely to bully through indirect methods like spreading rumors and purposefully excluding others. Bullying is usually worst during the middle school years, though it can occur from elementary school through high school and beyond into college and the workplace.

Bullying versus Violence:

• While violence and violent crimes have generally been decreasing in America, bullying has not.
• Violence is against the law, while bullying generally isn't unless it crosses the line into harassment or assault.
• Though violence is generally seen as an unacceptable type of behavior, more people accept bullying as a normal part of life.

Among teens, where violence and bullying are most common, violence is often linked to gangs, drugs, an impoverished neighborhood with fewer perceived opportunities, poor attachment to school, and poor academic accomplishment. Boys are much more likely to be involved in violence than girls. Bullying, on the other hand, is based on individuals, who may be boys or girls, but are often those who feel a need to be powerful and in control. Bullying victims may be students who do not know how to stand up to bullies.

School violence is often addressed by trying to reduce gang involvement, drug use, poor academic achievement, and anger management problems among students. Bullying requires different strategies. Other students may think bullying is normal or not know how to stand up to bullies, so education is an important prevention strategy for bullying, as is taking bullying seriously and instituting a zero-tolerance policy.

Despite their differences, there are strong links between bullying and violence. Both bullies and their victims are more likely to engage in other violent behavior. Victims generally suffer from depression and low self-esteem and may lash out violently, while bullies are more likely than others to engage in violent criminal behavior. Both violence and bullying can cause students to be afraid and to skip school.

Some common factors of that may contribute to bullying and violence are:

• Severe physical punishments used at home
• Lack of parental involvement
• Lack of knowledge about positive ways to deal with problems

Addressing these problems with positive parenting and by teaching problem solving skills and anger management could help reduce violence and bullying among some teens.

Sources:

Earnestine Bennett-Johnson, "The Root of School Violence: Causes and Recommendations for a Plan of Action," abstract from Education Resources Information Center [online]

Educational Resources Information Center, "Bullying in Schools. ERIC Digest." [online]
Valerie Strauss, The Washington Post, "Bullying, Thefts Persist Despite Drop in Violence" [online]
Virginia Youth Violence Project, "Research on Bullying" [online]
Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development, NIH News Release, "Bullies, Victims at Risk for Violence and Other Problem Behaviors" [online



Dealing with Bullying

Bullying can be a very traumatic experience for your child. It can cause physical and emotional harm, and damage your child for a long time to come. Indeed, a victim of bullying can suffer from physical injury, but the long lasting effects to someone's psyche can be even more damaging in the long term, even though these effects might be subtle. It is also important to note that bullying can take place without physical contact. Emotional, verbal and electronic (online or through text messaging on cell phones) abuse can cause the same emotional and psychological effects as physical bullying. Being bullied can lead to difficulty in forming healthy personal relationships, as well as leading to depression, low self image and even suicide.

The American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry bullying statistics estimate that about half of all children are bullied at some point during their school years. Close to 10 percent of children are bullied repeatedly. This is a rather large number, when you think about it. This means that it is vital that your child learns how to deal with bullying.

Tips for dealing with bullying, or a bully

It can be difficult to deal with bullying, or a bully. It is more helpful when a bully's parents and school are involved as well, working to help diffuse the situation. If you are concerned that your child is the victim of bullying, here are six steps you can take to try and help him or her in dealing with bullying:

1. Get your child's input: You need to be a safe place your child can turn for help when dealing with bullying. Be open to your child, and make sure that you are accepting. You should let your child know that being bullied is not his or her fault. Also, you should find out what has been tried to stop the bullying, and what has worked (or hasn't worked) so far.
2. Talk to the school authorities: Discuss the problem with your child's teacher, principal or counselor. A meeting with all three can help everyone know how to help a child who is dealing with bullying. In many cases, bullying takes place in unsupervised areas, such as school buses, bathrooms, playgrounds and other areas that can be hard to monitor. If you know where the bullying is taking place, you can let school authorities know so that they can step up "patrols" in those areas to discourage bullying.
3. Teach your child to avoid the bully: Your child does not need to fight back. Encourage him or her to avoid the bully when possible. Suggest that he or she walk away, and go find a teacher or other trusted adult.
4. Encourage your child to be assertive: It is not necessary to fight back to defeat a bully. You can teach your child to stand up straight and tell the bully, firmly, to leave him or her alone. In some cases, this type of assertiveness will work.
5. Practice with your child: It might be beneficial to have a little bit of role play with your child. This way he or she can practice what to say to a bully, or how to leave a situation that could turn into bullying.
6. Teach your child to move in groups: A good support system can be an effective deterrent against bullies. Have your child go to school and other places with trusted and true friends when dealing with bullying.

It is also important to help your children and their friends understand that it is not acceptable to harm others, physically, emotionally, verbally or electronically (cyberbullying). Indeed, you should teach your child to stand up to bullies who may be harasses other children. If your child and his or her friends are willing to come to the aid of others who are being bullied, soon the bully will have no one left to pick on.

Another important aspect of dealing with bullying is to watch your own child for signs that he or she might be a bully. It can be difficult to see such behavior in your own child, but you need to take bullying seriously, and let your child know that it is inappropriate. If your child is a bully, take the time to find out why he or she may be acting this way. In some cases, a child psychologist or developmental expert can help you figure out the reasons behind the behavior and work to change these behaviors.

Bullying can have long lasting effects on people. What happens during childhood can set the tone for the rest of one's life, and it is important that bullying is dealt with early on.

Cyber Bullying Statistics

Cyber bullying affects many adolescents and teens on a daily basis. Cyber bullying involves using technology, like cell phones and the Internet, to bully or harass another person.Cyber bullying can take many forms:

• Sending mean messages or threats to a person's email account or cell phone
• Spreading rumors online or through texts
• Posting hurtful or threatening messages on social networking sites or web pages
• Stealing a person's account information to break into their account and send damaging messages
• Pretending to be someone else online to hurt another person
• Taking unflattering pictures of a person and spreading them through cell phones or the Internet
• Sexting, or circulating sexually suggestive pictures or messages about a person

Cyber bullying can be very damaging to adolescents and teens. It can lead to anxiety, depression, and even suicide. Also, once things are circulated on the Internet, they may never disappear, resurfacing at later times to renew the pain of cyber bullying.

Many cyber bullies think that bullying others online is funny. Cyber bullies may not realize the consequences for themselves of cyberbullying. The things teens post online now may reflect badly on them later when they apply for college or a job. Cyber bullies can lose their cell phone or online accounts for cyber bullying. Also, cyber bullies and their parents may face legal charges for cyber bullying, and if the cyber bullying was sexual in nature or involved sexting, the results can include being registered as a sex offender. Teens may think that if they use a fake name they won't get caught, but there are many ways to track some one who is cyber bullying.

Despite the potential damage of cyber bullying, it is alarmingly common among adolescents and teens. According to Cyber bullying statistics from the i-SAFE foundation:

• Over half of adolescents and teens have been bullied online, and about the same number have engaged in cyber bullying.
• More than 1 in 3 young people have experienced cyberthreats online.
• Over 25 percent of adolescents and teens have been bullied repeatedly through their cell phones or the Internet.
• Well over half of young people do not tell their parents when cyber bullying occurs.

The Harford County Examiner reported similarly concerning cyber bullying statistics:

• Around half of teens have been the victims of cyber bullying
• Only 1 in 10 teens tells a parent if they have been a cyber bully victim
• Fewer than 1 in 5 cyber bullying incidents are reported to law enforcement
• 1 in 10 adolescents or teens have had embarrassing or damaging pictures taken of themselves without their permission, often using cell phone cameras
• About 1 in 5 teens have posted or sent sexually suggestive or nude pictures of themselves to others
• Girls are somewhat more likely than boys to be involved in cyber bullying

The Cyberbullying Research Center also did a series of surveys that found these cyber bullying statistics:

• Over 80 percent of teens use a cell phone regularly, making it the most popular form of technology and a common medium for cyber bullying
• About half of young people have experienced some form of cyber bullying, and 10 to 20 percent experience it regularly
• Mean, hurtful comments and spreading rumors are the most common type of cyber bullying
• Girls are at least as likely as boys to be cyber bullies or their victims
• Boys are more likely to be threatened by cyber bullies than girls
• Cyber bullying affects all races
• Cyber bullying victims are more likely to have low self esteem and to consider suicide

Parents and teens can do some things that help reduce the cyber bullying statistics:

• Talks to teens about cyber bullying, explaining that it is wrong and can have serious consequences. Make a rule that teens may not send mean or damaging messages, even if someone else started it, or suggestive pictures or messages or they will lose their cell phone and computer privileges for a time.
• Encourage teens to tell an adult if cyber bullying is occurring. Tell them if they are the victims they will not be punished, and reassure them that being bullied is not their fault.
• Teens should keep cyber bullying messages as proof that the cyber bullying is occurring. The teens' parents may want to talk to the parents of the cyber bully, to the bully's Internet or cell phone provider, and/or to the police about the messages, especially if they are threatening or sexual in nature.
• Try blocking the person sending the messages. It may be necessary to get a new phone number or email address and to be more cautious about giving out the new number or address.
• Teens should never tell their password to anyone except a parent, and should not write it down in a place where it could be found by others.
• Teens should not share anything through text or instant messaging on their cell phone or the Internet that they would not want to be made public - remind teens that the person they are talking to in messages or online may not be who they think they are, and that things posted electronically may not be secure.
• Encourage teens never to share personal information online or to meet someone they only know online.
• Keep the computer in a shared space like the family room, and do not allow teens to have Internet access in their own rooms.
• Encourage teens to have times when they turn off the technology, such as at family meals or after a certain time at night.
• Parents may want to wait until high school to allow their teens to have their own email and cell phone accounts, and even then parents should still have access to the accounts.

If teens have been the victims or perpetuators of cyber bullying they may need to talk to a counselor or therapist to overcome depression or other harmful effects of cyber bullying.

Sources:

Richard Webster, Harford County Examiner, "From cyber bullying to sexting: What on your kids' cell?" [online]

i-SAFE Inc., "Cyber Bullying: Statistics and Tips" [online]

Cyberbullying Research Center, "Summary of our cyberbullying research from 2004-2010" [online]

National Crime Prevention Council, "Cyberbullying" [online]

Parenting A Bully

Bullying is a repeated pattern of singling out another person for mean behavior. Boys and girls both bully, though boys tend to be more physical and girls more social in their bullying.Bullying can take a number of forms, including: 

• Physically pushing around another person
• Mocking or putting someone down
• Maliciously gossiping or spreading rumors
• Ignoring or excluding someone
• Using cell phones or the computer to send mean messages to a person 

When parents hear that their child is bullying others, it is a normal reaction for them to deny or defend the bullying, especially if the person telling them about the problem is accusatory, angry, or aggressive. Though it's difficult, parents should try to listen to what others are saying about their child. They can help keep the conversation more calm by asking the person to tell them about the problem without yelling or labeling their child a bully, and by reassuring them that they will talk to the child who has been acting like a bully. Parenting a bully starts with recognizing your child may be bullying other children.  

Parents of a child who is bullying others may not know how to approach the problem. Sometimes a school counselor or a mental health professional can help them understand the concepts associated with parenting a bully. Children and teens can bully for a number of reasons, including feeling insecure, having watched another person act like a bully, having been bullied themselves, or feeling that bullying can get them what they want, including social acceptance or dominance over others. 

Understanding why children bully can help you in parenting a bully.  Contrary to popular misconceptions, bullies general have friends and a high self-esteem. They are, however, more likely to be impulsive, aggressive, or easily frustrated, and to have trouble with rules and authority figures. They also tend to lack empathy for others. Bullying is not normal behavior or just part of growing up. It is important to get help for a child or teen who is acting like a bully because bullying can have a negative impact, not only on the victim, but also on the bully and the school or community. 

Children or teens who bully others are more likely to: 

• Turn to violence as a way to deal with problems, which can lead to fighting
• Rebel against or be aggressive toward authority figures, including parents
• Damage property or steal
• Abuse drugs or alcohol
• Do poorly in school
• Get in trouble with the law 

Parenting a bully can involve legal responsibilities.  Bullying can also cross the line into illegal behavior, including bullying that takes place on the phone or the computer. Parents can be held responsible for phone or computer bullying, which can include facing legal actions or losing their phone or internet accounts. 

Some things that parents can do to teach their children not to bully include: 

• Set a good example by not bullying or intimidating others, and standing up to friends or family members who act like bullies
• Talk to your child about the fact that bullying is wrong and hurts other people
• Make clear family rules about what bullying is and that any form of bullying is not acceptable. Explain what the consequences will be if anyone bullies, and make sure that you follow through on the consequences every time the rule is broken. Rules and consequences should not be too lax or too harsh
• Help children and teens learn to empathize with others by asking them to think about how someone else might feel about being bullied. It also may help to encourage them to do kind things for others, including those they don't know well.
• Spend time with your child and ask questions about their friends and their activities. Get to know their friends.
• Monitor teens' behavior, including their use of their cell phone and computer. Consider keeping a family computer and not allowing computers in children's or teens' rooms.
• Encourage your child's positive activities and goals and praise their accomplishments.
• Watch for and praise any times that they use positive social interactions or non-violent problem solving, such as showing empathy for others or compromising in an argument.
• Make sure children get any help they need if they are struggling in school or in other areas of their lives, including having problems with aggressive behavior or lack of self-control.
• Work with school teachers and administrators to discourage bullying at school and reward positive behavior
• Get counseling for children who have a persistent pattern of bullying to find out if there are any underlying problems causing the bullying. 

Though it may be difficult to admit a child or teen has a problem with bullying, getting them help will improve their well-being and chances for success in life. With help, parenting a bully can get easier.

Sources:

SAMHSA's National Mental Health Information Center, "Is Your Child a Bully?" [online]

Center for the Study and Prevention of Violence, Safe Communities - Safe Schools Fact Sheet, "Bullying Prevention: Recommendations for Parents" [online]

Sherryll Kraizer, Coalition for Children, Inc., Safe Child Program, "Take a Stand: Prevention of Bullying and Interpersonal Violence" [online]

National Crime Prevention Center, "Bullying: What Parents Can Do" [online]

Stop Bullying Now! "Help for Youth Who Bully" [online]

Girl Scouts, LMK: Life Online, "Do You Know the Consequences of Cyberbullying?" [online]

AND MUCH MORE!

Be sure to check this site out!

 http://www.bullyingstatistics.org/

Facts On Bullying

Bullying can happen anywhere. Many children and teens are regular victims of bullying, which can lead to serious emotional scarring and problems with the victim's self-esteem and self-image. Correcting these behaviors before they start or get out of hand are important for parents and educators to keep in mind. In this article we are discussing the facts on bullying and how  you can watch for warning signs in victims of bullying as well as in children who might be bullies themselves. 

Types of bullying:

• Verbal. This type of bullying usually involves name calling and or teasing
• Social. Spreading rumors, intentionally leaving others out of activities on purpose, breaking up friendships are all examples of social bullying.
• Physical. This traditional form of bullying involves hitting, punching, shoving and other acts of intention physical harm.
• Cyberbullying. This method of bullying involves using the Internet, texting, email and other digital technologies to harm others. 

Facts on bullying:

• Imbalance of power. Typically those who engage in bully-like behaviors use their strength, popularity or power to harm, control or manipulate others. They will usually target those who are weaker in size or may have a difficult time defending themselves.
• Intent to cause harm. A bully is a person who does not do things by accident. The bully intends to physically or emotionally injure a person or group of persons. 
• Repetition. Typically incidents of bullying are not a one-time thing. Bullies target the same person or group over and over again. 

It is important for parents to discuss the facts on bullying with their children to help teach them how to watch out for bullying and to avoid being bullied. There are several signs parents can look for when evaluating if your child is a victim of bullying.

• Comes  home with unexplained injuries or with damaged or missing clothing or other belongings
• Has change in eating habits
• Makes excuses not to go to school
• Has fewer friends
• Feels helpless
• Talks about suicide
• Acts out of character
• Avoids certain places or playing outside alone
• Feels like they are not good enough
• Has trouble sleeping
• Blames themselves for their problems 

The facts on bullying also provide information on what types of signs to look for in children who might be bullying others.

• Becomes frequently violent
• Has trouble controlling anger
• Is manipulative and controlling of others and situations
• Is quick to blame others
• Does not accept responsibility for their actions
• Needs to win or be the best at everything

Understanding these warning signs can help parents prevent their children from becoming bullies or help them not become a victim of a bully. Counseling or therapy are good methods in helping to treat a child who exhibits symptoms of bullying. Children who are victims may also need some kind of support or counseling to help resolve underlying issues of emotional feelings of inadequacy. Children who are confident and have higher self-esteem are less likely to fall prey to the attacks of bullying. 

Sources: mychildsafety.net, http://www.stopbullying.gov/